Monday, May 2, 2011

Game Rules

Game Rules

It’s like being picked last for the team; not thin enough, not pretty enough, not loved enough.

I want so much to play, but you keep pushing me to the back of the line. It’s not fair to expect me to follow the rules when you won’t share the play book with me. I’ve tried to play like all the others—the ones you compare me to without saying it—but it doesn’t seem to make you happy. And it only makes me weep.

I don’t think I want to play anymore. The problem is, I don’t know how to quit you.


Wine and Words said...

Haven't I said this? I think I must have. It feels so familiar as if my tongue just tasted the pain. There is nothing worse than your best not being good enough. Holy, holy, am I keenly aware.

Hoping this is fiction Monica!

Spook The Scribbler said...

*sigh* Unfortunately I know exactly how this feels. Hehe, 'orribly familiar of much of my childhood spent lurking the back of the playground wishing someone would actually let me join in a game rather than turning it into an impromptu game of tag, where I was permanently "it".
Feeling worthless stinks like the bottom of a shower recess that you haven't cleaned for a month :(

You've caught the feeling of it very well here - so well it's making me go all memory-lane-ish :P

Deborah said...

I think everyone has felt this at some point in their lives. Having the strength to simply walk away, and not 'play the game'... and save yourself that torture,is an invaluable life lesson, brilliantly written as always.