Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Quiet
Today's muse: Three Word Wednesday
Today's words: admire, follow, piece
* * *
Quiet
Swishy skirt, crisp white blouse and pearls at her throat; the closest she can be to the June she admires.
One more look around the living room she vacuumed twice today. Polished furniture gleams in the fading daylight. He’ll be home soon, it must be perfect, nothing out of order, everything in its place.
The intoxicating aroma of prime rib floats throughout the main floor. Rearrange the flowers on the table, centre the chairs, re-fold the napkins, press them once more.
Trembling hands smooth away nonexistent wrinkles in her skirt, finger the pearls he gave her for their anniversary, the ones he said would remind her of him, that feel like his manicured hands around her throat.
She struggles to push aside fear. He’ll see it, use it, torment her with it, take away the one piece of her she has come to love. She won’t let him. She can’t.
“Coming sweetheart!” She follows newborn cries up the stairs. “There, there,” she croons, rocking away tears. He hates when you cry, just be quiet, please be quiet.
Baby tucked in one arm, she spins the tap, fills the tub with water, tests with an elbow. A gummed smile is her reward when she floats the cherub in the tepid pool. She laughs as chubby legs kick and splash.
Daddy’s pretty little girl, his perfect little angel, no more crying now, no more crying, no more, no.
Bathwater is still as glass now, except for the occasional tear that streaks down her cheek and ripples the water to blur precious blue eyes that stare back from beneath the surface.
All is quiet now. Quiet.
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10 comments:
okay then...
*phew*
You capture undercurrents, tension and disfunction brilliantly ... ooh that ending!
Wow. That was amazing. Deborah is right, your grasp of tension and underlying emotions is incredible.
The ending gave me shudders.
No man is worth that sacrifice. Better to drown him instead. Despite that the writing is haunting in horror and anguish.
I like the way you captured this!
Love the tension in this story...it doesn't take long for you to start feeling her anxiety. Well done!
,,,Blue Ribbon here,,,and I don't mean Pabst,,
I can only imagine the bath water after the last line..'be the June she admires' was perhaps the most powerful line for me..quiet can be a scary state..Jae
Wow, crazy scary.
Excellent use of three words. I hope you'll check out my attempt.
so sad.very well written piece.
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